Life Lesson # 66: When all else fails, fake a smile. Sometimes in life we all have to just grin and bear it. How do you do that? It is very simple, laugh at yourself. Think of the most goofy thing you have ever done, and smile. People will wonder, then you can laugh at them. Life is too short, pretty soon you wont have to fake it anymore.
Life Lesson # 79: If you are being driven crazy, take a drive. Sometimes you just have to get away from everyone and everything. Go to a park, find a beach,(now that it is summer) head to the mountains, anything. Just get the hell out of Dodge. I find that loud music and a car go really good together when you are pissed.
Life Lesson #95: Find something to do that is fun. Talk your other half into a water balloon fight, better yet, get the water cannons out. Call your friends and start a softball game or football game. It is so much fun to tackle your friends. Get your ass outside, make your kids hang up the phones and the game controllers and kick them out of the the house. Now with that in mind, I cant go into the fun stuff for adults, lets just say there is a song from back in the 70s called Afternoon Delight. Look it up and you will know what I mean.(a dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste)
Life Lesson # 39: Sometimes it is better to just sit. Go find a tree, a bottle of wine, a blanket, a good book, and just sit. You need time to decompress your brain. In my case, its to find my brain. I'm sorry I lost it long ago, I forgot. Seriously though, you need to just breathe for a while. Shut off the cell phone, put away the laptop, tell the world to fuck off now and then.
Life Lesson # 88: In the immortal words of the Divine Miss M. a.k.a Bette Midler, Fuck em if they cant take a joke. Forget the bullshit that people use to clog your day, and when they piss you off, just smile at them. You see, you know something that they don't know. They are stupid people, and stupid people need to be laughed at. This is so much better than being pissed off all the time.
Take a minute to take care of yourself, laugh every chance that you can, smile because you can. Life will take its toll, the trick is to get out of paying. Sanity is an illusion, especially if you have kids.
